Things that you should never sacrifice in a relationship… No matter what

Your ability to be independent.

I get it, you’ve found the love of your life. If you want to be a stay at home mom, that’s fine. Great, even! It’s hard work and it’s not given enough credit.

But don’t drop out of college to marry the love of your life to start a family.

Don’t sacrifice everything to move to your boyfriend’s town and be financially dependent on him.

Don’t go into life with a main goal of settling down and marrying a man without developing skills of your own you could fall back on.

I know a girl who met her husband her sophomore year of college. She’d been pretty open about the fact that she was in college to meet a good man with a degree. She found him sophomore year, they married at the age of 21, she dropped out of college, and started having children one year after their marriage.

They were happy and everything was fine. Until her engineer husband went out to the oil field one day and was involved in an accident that killed him.

This girl was left with two children, no college degree, and was forced to move back in with her parents due to not having a source of income. She found a job waitressing in her small Oklahoma town and she can’t go back and get her degree because she has two kids to look after and no money. Don’t let that happen to you.

Another girl I know met the “love of her life” while she was waitressing. She had very little money, but she pulled together everything to move in with him in his small Oklahoma town.

The town had about 1,500 people, and she was able to get a waitressing job at a diner. But seeing as the town was so small, she didn’t make that much. A couple of months in, her and her boyfriend broke up. She had to move out of his house, but she had no money saved and a job that paid very little.

She’s now stuck in a town of 1,500 people with her ex-boyfriend, working at a diner that pays her very little, until she can save up enough to transfer to a new town. Don’t let that happen to you.

Yet another girl I know never went to college because she just wanted to get married. She found a man at the age of 20, married him, became a housewife, and had two kids with him.

Her husband became very abusive. She would threaten to leave him, but the husband would point out she had no way of supporting herself or the kids and she would have to leave the kids with him if she left. She knew he was right. She stayed with him for years until it got so bad, her aunt let her move in with him so she could leave him.

She got a retail job and her husband kept custody of the children since her income was so low. She still doesn’t have a way to get her kids from him without them going into Child Protective Services. Don’t let that happen to you.

It’s completely fine to want to follow your husband to his job. It’s completely fine to want to be a housewife. It’s absolutely okay to move to where your husband is even if there’s no work for you there because you love him. But it’s not okay to be completely dependent on him. Life is unpredictable. Your husband could die, become abusive, or you could breakup. None of those women thought it would happen to them, but it did.

Their complete dependence left them desolate in inescapable situations when it did.

Avoid that at all costs.

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